Have you got your sights set on finally ditching those over-long hours and missed funtime occasions? Achieving work/life balance doesn't have to be the colossal headache that everyone makes it out to be.
I can't do it. I don’t have time. I’m not good enough.
Sound familiar?
You’re not alone. Believe it or not, thoughts like these are common. After all we all have fears when we try new things.
But they’re definitely holding you back from creating the balance you want in your life.
When I first started my own practice, I worked easily 80 hours a week and said no to most social engagements because I had to “hustle” to be successful, right? Absolutely wrong.
Since then, I’ve learned a lot and I can’t wait to share it all with you.
Why is balance so important?
Because if you're burnt out and not enjoying your life, your career is going to take a pretty big hit - not to mention your mental & physical health!
So take a deep breath and settle in to learn 10 actionable ways to achieve work/life without having to feel like you’re missing out.
Yes, you can do “find the time”, and I’m going to show you how. Before we get into it a quick reminder:
Balance is not only personal, it's a practice.
#1. Set Goals for Your Balanced Life
When you work towards finally crafting balance in your life, it can be easy to get lost in the details and forget about the primary goal.
Your primary goal of creating work/life balance should always be front and center. Otherwise, you risk becoming discouraged.
Start with your Why here. Why do you want to create balance? What are you lacking? What do you want to gain?
Get very clear on what your ultimate goal is here.
Pro Tip: You may benefit from writing your goal somewhere you’ll see it. On your mirror, a post-it on your workspace, your desktop etc. The daily reminder will boost your confidence and keep you motivated.
#2. Collaborate With Your People.
Did you think you had to learn how to create balance all by yourself?
It’s a whole lot more fun – and motivating – when you collaborate with the other people you’re trying to find more time to spend with! Think about how your friends, spouse, kids, four-legged baby can help you create balance. Or, look for ways to incorporate them into your plans.
You can even work together on creating a plan for how you’ll spend your time together, and how you’ll plan to carve out that time.
Here are a few things to keep in mind during your planning with your people:
First, decide how you want to them to help. Is it a one-off thing? Are you looking for a long-term solution? Do you want to do a joint balance-finding venture together? Having this in mind beforehand will help you find the right ways to work with your people and set the right expectations from the start.
Second, don’t forget to use technology here to your advantage. Look for techy solutions to help you and your people free up time to fill with the activities you’re making space for.
Third, offer to get on a Zoom and brainstorm. Looking to wrangle your in-laws into helping with the kids so you and the spouse could have more ‘relationship time’? Get on a call and ask them how and when they’d want to spend time with their grand-kiddos. Make it a win win/collaborative effort.
Pro Tip: It may take a while to find the right places where your people can help but be patient and keep at it. Collaborating with others is one of the fastest and easiest ways to find the balance you’re craving.
#3. Remember to Get Enough Sleep.
You may be thinking to yourself, "I don't have time to sleep! If I did, I wouldn’t be banging on about needing balance!”, but if you don't take care of yourself, you won’t have energy to enjoy all the things you’re making time for.
Instead, make sure you get those Z’s.
According to LinkedIn you should pay close attention to your sleep hygiene if you want to achieve work/life balance.
Pro Tip: Not everyone in your family will support your new ‘early to bed’ routine right away. That’s okay, just stay committed to you. They’ll get on board eventually.
#4. Always, Always, Always Know Your Definition of “Balance.”
No matter what your end goal is, you need to understand your personal definition of “balance” because it’s a completely personal definition that changes from person to person.
If you feel like skipping this step, just remember that the more clarity you have on this, the easier it will be to achieve. And it will be easier to ask for help!
Here’s how to uncover your definition so you can create balance fast:
Ask: “When I hear the phrase “work/life balance” what do I think?”
Ask: “What is my concept of it vs my reality?”
How would I like to define “balance” for myself?
Pro Tip: Get as detailed as you possibly can. Create a totally clear concept of “Balance” for yourself.
#5. Avoid Overworking Yourself to the Point of Burnout At All Costs
“Supermoms” aren’t the only ones who suffer from burnout. It can happen to any/everyone.
That doesn't mean you will inevitably miss out on weekends with friends because your project plate is too full.
It just means that no matter how you’re defining “balance”, know that breaks have to be part of it.
One of those most important, yet most frequently dismissed balance boundary is ‘time off’. This includes:
Daily breaks
Weekly breaks (ahem the weekends)
Monthly breaks
Actual vacation time away
Solo time (away from work and home responsibilities)
Time to recharge, relax and regroup
PTO days for physical and mental needs
Breaks from technology, communication platforms, devices and connection
To figure out how you can best incorporate breaks into your balance, ask yourself where can you take beaks Daily?, Weekly?, Monthly? and Yearly?
#6. Upgrade Your Setting & Communicating Boundaries Skill
Do you know you could polish up your boundary setting skills? What are you waiting for?
Consider this your official permission slip to set those boundaries!
The cliff notes version for those who are busy: setting & communicating boundaries is imperative if you are ever to actually put a system in place to achieve the balance you so desperately seek.
You need to set and communicate clear boundaries to your friends, family, colleagues, clients & customers.
You can communicate a boundary in several ways:
Simply outlining your needs
Not responding to input
Using technology to hold create barriers (i.e. setting DND on your phone so your mother in law doesn’t facetime you at 5am)
Clarify with your team that as a caregiver you need to have flexible hours
Calibrate your language with those you’re setting a boundary with: “emergency” “urgent” and “fire” mean different things to each of us
Never assume that someone knows your boundary and is transgressing it willy-nilly. While you might believe something is obvious, it genuinely might not occur to many people. You have to communicate, share, speak up and then say it again!
#7. Why Should You Ditch the Concept of “Balance” as a 50/50 Concept?
The term “Work/Life Balance” indicates that there are just two things: work & life. However, life is not see-saw built of 2 elements, there are (at minimum) 4 categories that need to be addressed:
Work/Career
Family/Friends
Fun/Play
Health/Wellbeing
Don't snooze on creating your ‘Balance Pie’ friend.
There are a few things I’d recommend with this:
Know that there’s no ‘right’ way to carve up your pie
However much of your total time you want to allocate for each ‘slice’ is up to you
Go for your ideal pie, don’t put constraints on it.
Here’s an example of a Balance Pie that one of my clients created.
#8. Good News: Saying “No” is Your New Go-To
Learning how to say no can be one of the most difficult skills for anyone to put into practice. But it’s arguably the most important part of creating balance.
Step one: audit the usual demands of your day and decide what to prioritize and what to delete.
What can/do you want to say no to?
Part of what makes “No” so effective for creating balance is that it’s short, sweet and simple.
When you find yourself hesitating to say “No,” do your best to remember that saying “Yes” to something you don’t want to do is a “No” to something you actually do.
#9. Don't Hesitate to Use Some Tools to Stay Balanced
One of my favorite tools is the “Eisenhower Decision Matrix.” It’s a simple chart to help you make decisions based on Importance vs Urgency. Simply take your tasks and apply them to the matrix to assist you in ditching things that can be deleted from your to-do list.
#10. Always start your day belting out Beyonce in the shower.
Achieving balance can be hard. This is why it's essential to keep up the momentum and good humor by really setting yourself up for success!
All kidding aside, and no it doesn’t have to actually be Beyonce, but why not?!
Start each day with something that makes you feel good and reaffirms that you’re prioritizing yourself and creating space for the life you want to live.
There you have it!
Did you find these tips helpful? Share your top tip to stay motivated on the path to balance in the comments below!
If you still need coaching, get in touch here. There are no silly questions, and I am always happy to hear from you.
For more on creating balance, including how to dig deep to understand what it is and why you want it check out the resources below:
BALANCING SUCCESS AND WELL-BEING: A GUIDE TO MAINTAINING WORK-LIFE HARMONY
WHY TRYING TO BALANCE WORK & LIFE DOESN'T WORK: A BETTER WAY TO ACHIEVE BALANCE
WORK-LIFE BALANCE. WHAT IT REALLY MEANS AND HOW TO GET IT.
And finally, if you’re looking for more step-by-step advice to help you get started with creating a career that actually works for you click here to get on the Career Community list now for weekly help sent straight to your inbox.
Yours in it’s about balance goodness-
EBS
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EB Sanders | Career Coach for Creative Types
ebsanders.com
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